It's so exciting...at work they want to promote me to "Michael's Spy"!! See, I asked Debbie [events coordinator] about if there was a beading class this month, because I wanted to take one. Beading can look pretty awesome, but any patterns I've looked at seem all confusing, so I figured if I did it once with an instructor, maybe I could follow books easier.

Anyway, there was a class going on right then, but since I was working I couldn't really go. The next one is July 25th. They're having some problems with the instructor, thinking she's doing some illegal activities back there. One of the students even complained to the manager that Debbie was back there while the class was going on. Uhh...hello? It's her fucking classroom! So yeah, they're gonna pretend I'm just a Jo(sephine) Blow and have me spy on her, to see if she really is doing illegal stuff back there.

It makes me feel all important, and Debbie was SO excited about it, she was running around telling EVERYONE that I needed he 25th off because I had something more important to do :P

In other news...I want to talk about my pants. I keep saying they're frustrating, but I want to explain to you exactly why. (Just a lil note...only read it if you're bored...and I honestly mean that because it's a bunch of crap)

Okay, I'm widening the legs out so I can fit the smurf pillow panel on it without looking strange. At the bottom, they're going to be 38" around each leg, so it's quite a bit bigger than the pattern.

First I had to lengthen the legs by some inches, which required cutting the pattern in the middle and adding some paper...not too difficult.

Then I had to take measurements of the width of the leg on the pattern, at five inch intervals and then subtract 10/8" from each measurement for the seam allowance (5/8" on each side).

After that, I did the same with a pair of pants I already had that I sorta wanted to mimic, minus a few minor changes. I put the two into a table and then realized that I couldn't add equal amounts to the front and the back of the leg because if you ever looked at a pair of pants laid flat, the back of the leg is always bigger than the front.

So then I had to go back and remeasure the pants I had, measuring the entire width (laid flat), multiplying it by two (to get the circumference), measure just front seam to front seam (to get the front measurement), and then subtract that from the whole circumference to get the back measurement.

Then I had to find the difference between the pattern and the way I wanted it to be and I put that into the table. Then I had this terrible realization that I had to add the difference to the pattern, but you can't add equal amounts to the inside and the outside of the legs (both on the front and the back), because it just doesn't work like that.

So after sitting there frustrated about how to do this for probably 45 minutes, I figured something out. Since the pattern was for 3/4, 5/6, 7/8, 9/10, 11/12, and 13/14 sizes, I measured the width of the 3/4 leg, then did the same for the 13/14 leg at the same spot. Then I found the difference between the two, and then measured the difference on the inside of the leg, dividing it by the total difference, to find out what percentage of the total it was.

Turned out to be 21%, so then I multiplied all of the differences I measured (this is only on the back) by .21 and wrote that down. Then I subtracted that from the total to get the outside difference. I hope this isn't too confusing, but in all honesty, it was pretty confusing to me and I fuckin rocked the house back in the day when I took math. Of course, not to brag or anything :)

So once I got all that down, I taped some paper onto the sides, and measured out at my five-inch intervals how much to increase on the inside, and on the outside. Then I connected the dots and cut it out! I just did the back so far though...I still have all that work to do on the front, too :(

I think I went a little too far into detail with that, but all this fucking work and I haven't even touched the fabric yet! I have to make everything difficult and confusing. But it'll be worth it...hopefully :)

Catfish and corn--I went to my dad's house today! I came home with pees and beans and peapods from the garden. Very nice! Played football again and (surprise, surprise) hurt my wrist again.

My lil bro was being hilarious though. He was so serious about everything, and saying the most jacked up shit. The only thing I can remember is him in the bathroom while we were eatin yellin "CAN SOMEONE COME AND STAY WITH ME?" and then a few minutes later "MOM I'M DONE!" Once my stepmom left the table, my Dad, Chris, and I CRACKED up. Pappy even broke a sweat and I was definitely cryin.

After the BOYS of summer have gone!

I just have to say, little kids are quite dangerous with frisbees. They'd get all close and then fling it as hard as they could. I got smacked in the face and ass a few times.

Hmm...I think this entry is pretty hefty as of now. I feel like workin on my pants. I have two days off!

Yup...have a good one :D